Bachelor Ben: Blindsided!

The week before hometowns is upon us. But it's somebody's hometown: We're in Warsaw, Indiana, where Ben grew up and went to high school. It's a quaint town where the diner has a hi-tech sign written in chalk that reads, "No, we don't have wi-fi. Talk to each other!" So bossy.

Ben meets an actor couple playing his parents. They're much too young and good looking to realistically be the parents, but whatever. When describing each of the women still left, he avoids saying, "Becca is a virgin." How is that not the go-to description of her?

Ben meets the remaining half dozen on the lake. He pulls up in a boat of some kind. Odd looking thing. He takes them to a quaint house where they'll hunker down for a week.

The last remaining Lauren gets the first date. She's the flight attendant. I gotta remember that. I think I'm finally starting to figure out who everyone is.

Ben drives Lauren around in a red pickup truck. She's snuggled right up to him as he drives. I'm not sure she's wearing a seatbelt, but it's a small town. He shows her his high school, told him he played quarterback on the football team (of course he did), showed him his church, talked about his first kiss in Grade 7.

Final stop, Baker's Youth Club. Ben worked there for four years so he has special privileges that let him park on yellow lines. They walk into a gym full of kids shooting hoops (it's Indiana, recall). The club organizer gets a kid named Halfcourt Ronnie to take a half-court shot. If he makes it, Ben has to kiss Lauren. They gotta come up with better stakes. Halfcourt Ronnie, perhaps unsurprisingly, hits the shot.

The big moment comes when Paul George and George Hill of the Indiana Pacers walk in, pushing Ben and Lauren into the background. But Ben impresses Lauren with the way he interacts with the kids. She says he's going to make a great father. They kiss again, without anyone making a half-court shot first.

At night Lauren wants to bring up the charges brought against her last week by... I forget already. Oh right, Leah. Leah said Lauren wasn't the same around the house as she was around Ben. It all seems like such a researchable topic. Simply ask a few of the others. But Ben trusts her. This date brought things full circle, he says, whatever that means. But Lauren is relieved. Half-court shot!

They end up at Ben's local dive bar, as he calls it. They sit and drink with a bunch of other people. Who are these people? Friends of his? Strangers? We'll never know. Lauren tells the camera she's in love with Ben. She doesn't get a rose, though, only because there isn't one to give out.

The next date goes to JoJo. I haven't warmed to JoJo yet. Nor Emily, for that matter. Probably not Amanda either. That's half of them.

This date is in the Windy City. Chicago? Yes, Chicago. Ben is a huge Cubs fan so they go to Wrigley Field. Ben calls her Joj.

They don some jerseys and play ball. Ben pitches to Joj and she pops one slowly out of camera's eye. Ben says she "crushed" the ball, forgetting that everything was filmed and we witnessed it. They lie down in the outfield and talk, with their images up the big screen.

Ben says he's more himself around JoJo than he is around anyone else. Maybe she's his frontrunner. Not mine, certainly.

At night, a table for two is set up in the outfield. Ben tells us he's falling for her. Is that code? Joj seems less than sure. She tells him she's trying not to hold back. He says when she gets scared, she pulls back. It's clear this strategy is working for her. Or not. Now he tells her he questions to what extent her feelings are there.

She tells him, "I can confidently say that I care about you more than" (hard swallow) "anything." She tells him she's not afraid to fall anymore. She more Team Ben than she's ever been. Home-run! (Or at least first base.) Again, no rose, but no rose to give.

Caila, Amanda, and Becca are going on a group date. That means Emily the Twin gets a one-on-one. She breaks down in tears of happiness.

Come to think of it, Becca is also not on my frontrunner list. To me it's between Caila (1) and Lauren (2). I guess if I were going to put them in order, the rest would be (3) JoJo, (4) Amanda, (5) Becca and (6) Emily. But I digress.

More fun on the lake, this time in row boats. Becca and Amanda in one boat, and Caila and Ben in the other. It's a group date. That's hardly fair.

Then they fly some kites, and sit in a barn with a rose on the line. The rose turns the group date into a one-on-one. Whoever gets it gets to hang out the rest of the day with Ben with the other two going home. Again unfair.

I'm sure the editors are running Amanda's film audio speed faster. If not, she should audition for voice acting work in cartoons.

Becca's been stressed out and tells Ben. She's tightly wound, that one. If only there were some way she could loosen up...

She gives Ben permission to send her home. She whispers, "Just don't blindside me." My best bet: She gets blindsided.

Caila tells Ben she doesn't have deep roots. She moved about 17 times before college. Why is that? Will we ever find out or will this be like the Ugly Toes issue: only hinted at.

The rose is looming. He feels good about all three of them, he tells them. He gives it to Cartoon Amanda, which I guess is no surprise since we saw highlights of Ben frolicking with her daughters.

Becca and Caila sit and mope while Ben and Amanda take off in a limo. Finally Becca cries. She is human after all. She's frustrated and confused and wondering where they go from here. Blindsided, you might say.

Caila is also upset. She's hung up on this community thing, or lack thereof.

Did you know Warsaw is the Orthopedic capital? That's what the sign says. They must be proud.

Ben takes Amanda to McDonald's. Product placement at its worst. How romantic. They were told to order breakfast, I'm certain, since it's a new thing Ronnie Mac's is offering. But at the table, they're eating fries. That's not breakfast food! (Don't you think he should have taken Emily on this date?)

But that wasn't the extent of the romantic date. From fast food to a carnival. Ben says it feels right to be around Amanda, describing her as "funny." Now that's funny!

They do a bunch of rides that scare Ben. He makes a great point: "Fair rides scare me. They get set up in a day." Thanks, Ben. I'll never go on another fair ride.

Last date, this one with Emily. He's on that big, weird boat on the lake. This date is so special she took off her thumb wrap. Caila describes Emily as a "bright-eyed puppy. Everything is new and exciting, but the thing is she's got so much to learn still." Caila, for the record, is 24. But a wiser, more mature 24. Emily is a young 23.

Ben takes Twin 1 to meet his parents. Talking to people can be a difficult thing for her, she admits. She says she needs to not be nervous. And then we see her yammer nervously and nonstop to Ben's mom as mom sits smiling vacantly, especially when Emily admits to dreaming of being an NFL cheerleader. Then dad asks her what she likes doing and she's stumped for an answer. All she can think of is to say she loves sitting around watching movies all day long and doesn't like vegetables. I think she's totally ready... for Ben to adopt.

Mom naturally thinks Emily is too young for Ben. I also think mom is wondering about son's ability to find a life partner.

Mom gets teary with Ben without explicitly stating, "No! Don't choose Emily!" But Ben picks up what she's laying down. I wonder if she'll get sent home from the date. Meanwhile, Emily is oblivious. She's over the moon.

On the boat she says, "Where are we going? You're not taking me home, are you?" Um, yup. Smart move by Ben introducing her to his parents first. Everyone else will look great to them in comparison. He sits her down outside the house with the other girls inside watching and sends her home. She takes it relatively well. Actually really well. The girls inside are shocked, in that special schaudenfreude way. Emily does break down a bit inside telling the girls what happened, but she'll be fine. It would have been an awkward hometown date with her anyway, especially if Twin 2 is lurking.

There are five left. It's four for the hometown dates, right? Who will be leaving? Ben doesn't even seem to know. My guess is it's Blindsided Becca.

Ben tells Chris Harrison there's one person who isn't quite there yet. Caila seems to think it's her. I doubt it. He's not a complete idiot.

The rose ceremony is outside in public. No one is around, though. It would be cool to see passersby. Amanda has a rose already. The rest go to:

1. The one and only Lauren
2. Joj
3. Caila

Bam! Nailed it! They don't call me the Bachelor Blogger for nothing!

I gotta feel for Blindsided Becca. She whispers to Ben on the way out, "Why did you do that?" Now she's telling him, "I asked you yesterday not to blindside me." But does that mean he has to choose her? Any time he sends her home would have blindsided her. But she tells him she'd rather it be now than later if he was uncertain. So she took it well, too.

In the limo she speaks of her frustration. Sh asks herself why she keeps putting herself in this position. She doesn't want to be alone. I think she's going to have to put herself in a different position very soon.

Judging from next week's highlights, looks like we got some fun coming up. My one take-away is that JoJo's brother looks like Greg Brady. Not as much as Ben looks like Peter Brady, but close enough.

Bachelor Ben: Unfounded confidence lost

And we are continuing with the To Be Continued. Will Olivia be sent home or not? I'm on record as saying Not. No way. She's not done for. Ben asked to speak to her before the ceremony, but she has a rose. It ain't happening. Let's see if I'm right.

Ben is asking Olivia what her side of the story is. He's concerned that she's not connecting with the other women. Olivia feels like she can't win. Everyone is into painting their nails and doing each other's hair. She, on the other hand, prefers reading books in her room and thinking. Or as she puts it, "I wanna talk... smart... things." Well said.

She realizes she comes off as intimidating but it's because she's really confident. But she breaks down and cries like someone not so confident.

And as expected, she comes back with rose in hand. He tells them he enjoys and appreciates each one of them. They're all different. Well, now that one of the twins is gone anyway.

The remaining Twin is angry that Olivia is still there. Olivia talks tough, telling the camera, "Come at me, bro... Everybody else can suck it."

Now we're at that point we all hate: a rose ceremony to start the show. Who is already pre-rosed? Olivia for one. Who else? Must be Amanda and Lauren H. The others go to:

1. Caila, naturally
2. Lauren B., whichever one she is.
3. JoJo
4. Becca, the virgin
5. Leah. Who? Has she had any camera time this season?
6. Twin

So the Twin gets one. Meaning Bennifer is going home. What? One woman? Much ado about nothing, methinks.

All right, pack your bags. We're going to the Bahamas.

There will be three dates: 1-on-1, group date, and the dreaded 2-on-1.

Hey, speak of the devil. Leah gets some camera time. But she doesn't get the one-on-one date. That goes to the terminally sweet and cute Caila. Leah is speechless, much like she's been all season. She's questioning everything. At least she's figured out how to get some airtime: tears.

Ben comes in to get Caila and sits down next to Leah. It would have been perfect if he had introduced himself, like, "Hi, I'm Ben. I don't think we've met."

Caila and Ben are going deep sea fishing, one of his favourite activities. They set off on a big fancy boat. Leah bawls back at the hotel. I can't be too sympathetic because we get to see Caila in a bikini hauling in a big fish.

Okay, Leah, stop. Get a hold of yourself.

Ben calls Caila funny, beautiful, sexy, smart, but he wants to get to know her below the surface. He tells her she smiles a lot, and he guesses she smiles through tough times. But he's looking for someone who cries through tough times. Careful what you wish for, buddy.

She tells him she's not sure if she's ready to cry on his shoulder. She feels put on the spot. He understands. She tells him she feels like she loves him, but she doesn't know why she can't share. She thinks maybe she's not ready. Her greatest fear is that she can't totally completely fall in love with someone. Her greatest fear is breaking his heart. Not sounding good.

He thinks he might be saying goodbye to her tonight. If so, let's start the Caila for Bachelorette campaign now!

He wants to know what exactly she's feeling, if she thinks he's not the right person. She admits to being a confusing person. But she talks her way out of it. We know this because hopeful music starts playing. Ben melts. She feels real happiness. He thinks it's attracted to her confusion. It's authentic. So she gets the rose and we can breathe a sigh of relief.

Earlier I made reference to Ben looking like a young Tom Cruise. In this episode, he's looking like Peter Brady.

It's group date time. And another boat date. They hint at Jaws but instead get swimming pigs. Looks like they're feeding them weiners. Is that appropriate? Isn't that cannibalism?

JoJo is struggling with the group date dynamic. Ben thinks she should get how it's awkward for everyone. It's awkward especially for Leah, who was expecting the one-on-one. And she tells him that, too, tearfully. She feels like a group date groupie. She tells Ben she's human. Ben gets that she's human. They hug but she goes back and cries some more to the others saying Ben is an idiot for not giving her a chance.

At night, Leah feels like she's going home. Boo-hoo.

Ben grabs Becca first. He tells her he felt like she was standoffish with him today. She cops to it. But she says she really, really likes him and they kiss.

Everyone seems to think Lauren B. is the frontrunner on the date. Is she the flight attendant or the kindy-garten teacher? I mixed them up last episode. Get rid of one of them.

Leah tells Ben she thinks Lauren B. is different in the house than she is towards him. Is she making that up? Have we seen evidence of this? Lauren B. walks in on them. Timing is everything. Oh, and Lauren B. is the flight attendant.

Ben confronts the flight attendant. She doesn't get it. The thought gets in his head and he doesn't know what to do with it. If I were her, I'd ask Ben to canvas all the other women to find out what they think.

Lauren B. tells the others what was said. Leah gives a perplexed look, like that's crazy talk, and says, "Well, I didn't say anything." Okay, Leah, we're onto you now. Leah says, "I would never be the type of person to single somebody out." Clearly the others should rush to Lauren B's defence.

Rose time. I bet it goes to Leah. Nope. It goes to Amanda, who takes a whiff of helium before saying, "Thank you!"

Leah is relieved Lauren B didn't get the rose, but she didn't get one herself so says she'll have to do something more extreme. Classy.

Amanda, while stroking Twin's arm, who's lying in bed, suspects it was Leah. Now Leah knocks on Ben's door to make him believe it was Lauren B. Even classier. She figures if someone goes home, it increases her chances of staying. But I don't think she's thought this through. If she somehow bypassed all the others and won the whole thing, Ben would find out while watching the season play out on TV, and he'd dump her in a second.

The camera just happens to be on Ben sitting by himself in his room when Leah knocks on the door. Ben pours them some wine and she gets down to business. Her sociopathic tendencies come shining through. She says there are situations with Lauren that she doesn't care as much she lets on to him. She's totally lying. I think that's a Bachelor first. She says, "I'm not here to sabotage your relationship with somebody." Except that's exactly what she's doing. But Ben sees through her. He doesn't want to sit there and talk about Lauren B. with her. Good for him. Good guy, that Ben.

He tells her something just doesn't feel right. She says, "Really?" He sends her home! Backfire! Ah, sweet karma. He must have been tipped off. Does he now discount everything he heard about Lauren B?

"I literally did not see that coming," she says. She feels foolish but thinks Ben is the fool for letting her go. He thinks he has no idea who she is. Boy, ain't that the truth!

Twin 1 calls Twin 2 to rub it in that she's in the Bahamas. Ugly Toes thinks Twin 1 is a child, but they're the same age. She knows it, too, but still thinks she'll feel like the mom on the two-on-one.

Olivia is almost giddy because it's her first "almost one-on-one." That's glass-half-full thinking! Twin 1 is terrified. It's another boat ride. I guess there's only so much to do in the Bahamas. It's stormy out there. Here's hoping one of them throws up.

They sit on the windy beach and drink white wine. Ben takes Olivia away first. She buries her ugly toes in the sand as they sit and talk. Smart move. She tells Ben she's more of an introvert and she's at peace with that. She's very grounded. She tells him she's really strong and confident. "Deep... intellectual... things are just... my jam." I think Aristotle said that first.

Her confidence grows even more. "From here on out, hometowns, whatever, it's all a breeze," she says. She's so in love with him. She thinks he's given her more validation that anyone else. She's getting the rose (in her mind, anyway).

Next up is Twin 1's turn. She wants this date to be the turning point. She's very serious. She knows she has a lot of growth "and stuff" in front of her. He walks her back without a kiss.

Ben picks up the rose then takes Olivia away with it. Emily is heartbroken and devastated. That means Emily will get it. Let's see.

Ben tells Olivia she was able to speak from her heart. She looks hopeful until he says he doesn't think he can reciprocate his feelings. So he tells her he can't give her the rose he's holding and has to say goodbye. What is going through her mind now? And will we get to see her toes?

He goes back to Emily and says he doesnt' want to stop this journey with her. She accepts the rose and squeals as Olivia stands motionless 50 feet away. Ben and Olivia Emily get on the boat and leave, while Olivia stands still with her toes buried in the sand, all alone. Poor kid.

Ben doesn't feel like talking to anyone at the cocktail party. He sends in his henchman, Chris Harrison, to let them know.

Here we go. Three roses to give out. Twin 1, Squeaky Amanda and Cute Caila already have a rose. The rest go to:

1. Virgin Becca
2. JoJo was a man who thought he was a loner
3. Lauren B the flight attendant

Finally, one of the Laurens is gone. I liked the other one, but there's only room for one Lauren. The kindy-garten teacher goes back to the kiddies. She doesn't really get it. She thought she'd be great for him. She's feeling like she's never going to fall in love.

In the upcoming highlights Twin 1 says she can't believe she just met Ben's parents. So there goes that surprise. Looks like in the final he pulls a Jason Mesnick and sends the girl he loves more home, then calls her up to make things right. I love it when the show provides its own spoilers.

No, I don't.

See you next week.

Bachelor Ben: To Be Continued

Oh hi. What are you doing here?

Right. The TV show. Gotcha. Sorry this is a bit late. I wasn't near a computer last night. But I was watching and jotted down some notes.

This was another one of those annoying TBC episodes. The three most hated words in television: To. Be. Continued.

Really? Do we need this? Does anyone think Ben is going to rescind the rose to Olivia? Not a chance. They didn't show her in the upcoming highlights but I think we heard her. And someone next week says, "How could he be falling for this act she's putting on?" Who else could they be referring to?

I gotta say as annoying as old Ugly Toes Stank Breath Olivia has been, I think last night she was at her least annoying. Sure, you could use the Teen Mom quote against her, but I got the real sense she just misspoke. It's a show she obviously watches and maybe Amanda's descriptions of the comings and goings of single motherhood aligned with some situations on that other reality show. You could tell as soon as she said it she realized what she said.

So I'll cut her some slack on that one. I won't cut her slack for constantly attaching herself to Ben's side. That being said, if I were Bachelor (and don't you all think I should be?!), I would institute some rules and interrupting and such. On the group date, for instance. They were grouped into pairs. Since there were 9 women, that meant Ben would have to be a partner. If I were him, I'd either grab someone I hadn't had much time with or I'd pull names from a hat to pair everyone up. Whatever. Don't just go with the first loudmouth who pops up. Maybe I'd go with the person who said nothing. I dunno, but come up with something.

Love how the show started with a creepy cameraman with night-vision lurking in the women's bedrooms while they slept. It was 4:19 am and Ben was there to collect Amanda. We saw all sorts of bed heads and puffy eyes and retainers. But Amanda woke up sparkly, perky and fresh. Probably because the mother-of-two is used to being woken up at all hours of the morning.

She and Ben went hot air ballooning. Has that been a date in past seasons? I'm thinking it was. They were in Mexico City and were flying off to... wherever the wind took them, I guess. In this case it was ancient pyramids. (Are there any other kind?) Seeing flames and wicker so close together freaks me out. There's no way I'd go up in one of those.

Amanda, like many of the "blondes" on the show, are getting less and less blonde as the series progresses.

She talked about her bad first marriage and how she found text messages on her husband's old phone with many girlfriends. She felt like a failure. Ben couldn't understand how someone "out there" would "wrap [her] up and love on [her]." Love on her? Eww!

I love how Emily is still called "Twin" on her graphic.

Jubilee sealed her fate on the group date by being a sour puss. I still don't get how people (men and women) come on this show and not get how they're going to be but one of many girlfriends or boyfriends of the star. There was an ESL (Español as a Second Language) component to the date, with Ben declaring his love in Spanish for each of the girls. Jubes was having none of it. It was all too insincere for her.

Then the pairs competition alluded to earlier. They were to go out to the market with their newfound language skills and gather ingredients for a dish, and then cook it up. I'm wondering who'll be the first to get Montezuma's Revenge. I guess that comes with drinking the water. And they stuck to Tequila so they were safe.

Jubes and her partner (I forget who) won the cook-off but it didn't help her any. She was in full pout mode, and that's never appetizing.

JoJo's taco wasn't as delicious as she thought. The editors had a field day with JoJo and her taco. "I'm really excited for the chefs to taste my taco," she said. And "I know my taco is delicious." Duly noted.

At night, Ben would take one of them off for some alone time, hand in hand. But after roaming the streets for ages with Lauren H., kissing all the way, Jubes was in no mood to be fake holding hands when Ben called on her. This rubbed Ben the wrong way and he sent her on her way. "I'm like the most unloveable person in the world right now," Jubes said, stealing a line from sad-sack Ben last season.

I'm just relieved Ben and Lauren H. made it back safely without getting kidnapped or shot.

As Ben struggled to find the words to tell the others about Jubes getting the old heave-ho, JoJo interrupted him and asked to take him aside. I was thinking maybe she wanted him to taste her taco. No, they just kissed. But the rose went to Ugly Toes Stank Breath because Ben felt they reconnected on the date.

The last one-on-one went to the kindy-garten teacher Lauren H. She's a down-home girl with a sense of humour and a loving goofiness. They went to a fashion show. She actually thought that was the extent of their date. Oh dear sweet naive Lauren H. This show doesn't just send people on dates to watch something. Of course she'd be part of the experience, despite her only experience walking is when she takes her charges out to recess. She felt rather "unsecure." In her defense, "insecure" probably isn't a word used much in her kindergarten class.

But she and Ben both looked like they belonged on the runway, proving just how easy being a runway model is, providing you're not hideous and know how to put one foot in front of the other.

She also revealed that her 4-year relationship came to a close after her boyfriend cheated on her with three different girls. If there's anything to dissuade a guy from cheating on his wife or girlfriend, maybe this show is helping. Cheat and risk your ex getting on national TV and exposing your jerky behaviour to the world.

Lauren H. obviously got the rose, too.

At the cocktail party, several women felt the need to rat out Olivia to Ben, giving him pause. Usually I'm all for this kind of behaviour because the villain is more villainous. In this case, Olivia is a bit much but doesn't seem to be so horrible, all things considered. But when Chris Harrison enters to ding his glass, signalling the end of the cocktail party and start of the rose ceremony, Ben asks to first speak to Olivia.

And that's where they left us. I'm pretty confident the Big O will be with us again next week. You? What do you think?

Oh, by the way, I'd Tweet more from my @BachelorBlogger account if I had more followers. Just sayin'.

Like the show, this blog is To Be Continued, too.